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Dear Gy, You are growing up too fast. I know what you’re going to say. That it’s part of life, that there isn’t any other way to go about it and that it’s inevitable. Although I doubt if you know what the word ‘inevitable’ means yet. But I shouldn’t underestimate you.

There’s a beauty in growing up as much as there is a sadness. On the one hand I miss that chubby, cherubic face of yours that I could cup and shower with kisses.

I miss those tiny cheeks that would snuggle against my own as I tried, in vain, to fall asleep after a long day. I yearn for the days when the patter of tiny feet would alert me to the fact that you were awake early in the morning and had followed me into the kitchen, reaching out for your hug and a glass of milk.

Photo for representation purpose

And yet, I am proud of who you are growing up to be. Your kindness is one that I can always learn from. I’ve noticed how infinitely kind you are and it doesn’t come easily to everyone.

When I’ve scolded you for something and end up feeling bad, I apologise, usually within the hour. But, you reflect a maturity far beyond your years in this situation. You look up from your book with genuine surprise and ask, ‘Are you still worried about that? I forgot all about it.’ 

Your emotions are highly volatile, though. I know it’s a part of the adolescent stage and it’s taken me by surprise on many occasions. Do you remember the time you lashed out at me for forgetting to call a friend of yours the night before? I looked up in genuine astonishment but did not react. After standing there, glaring at me for a few minutes you stormed away and slammed the door.

I waited a few minutes and then walked quietly over to your room and went about helping you put your things away. Within minutes, you came and hugged me, apologising for the outburst. I’ve realised that is all that you need sometimes: an outlet for your anger and compassion when it overwhelms you. 

A few years ago, I’d have lectured you on the need to respect your elders and controlling your emotions. But I know that’s not helpful. Nor is it ideal. If we bottle up our emotions, we end up exploding when we least expect it.

You are a very unique blend of childhood and a wise old soul. I see it in your eyes; I feel it in your hugs; I sense it in the deep, thought-provoking things that you say, when you say it.

It is my honest wish that you take growing up with a pinch of salt but a lot of readiness. Life is waiting in the wings, to sucker punch you and delight you, both. Don’t let either of it sway you too hard. What I love about you is your sense of balance and the fact that you can be as helpful and eager on one day and moody and churlish the next. 

I may not admit it at the moment but I actually love watching you navigate this phase of life. How you handle it today will go a long way towards building your reserves for the future.

People may say (as I do) that you are growing up too fast. While that is true, remember to cherish every moment of this breathtaking space called childhood and tween-age. Before you know it, this will pass and what you’ll be left holding is a heart full of memories and a life full of experiences.

With love always,


Growing up too fast? I know it's hard and rather heartbreaking. But as a parent, here's what I say to my child and what you should too. #Shailajav #Parenting #PositiveParenting #GrowingUp #Emotions #Tweens #teens #Adolescence

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Pin image of silhouette little girl by Nadia Eugene

Shailaja V

Hi there! I'm Shailaja Vishwanath, a blogger with 12 years of blogging experience and a parent to a teen. I work as a digital marketing and social media consultant. From positive parenting tips to useful productivity hacks, social media advice to blogging advice, you'll find them all right here. Welcome to my blog.


Laksh · October 6, 2018 at 2:47 am

Bittersweet. I can relate so much to that notion of my babies becoming girls becoming women.

Obsessivemom · October 6, 2018 at 8:51 pm

It’s uncanny the similarities that I see between my daughter and yours – the bursts of anger followed by almost immediate hugs and apologies – completely identifiable. They really are growing up too fast. Somedays they are so frustrating I want them to just grow up and go and then somedays I want time to stand still and for them to never grow up. Sigh!

    Shailaja · October 7, 2018 at 7:50 am

    Sigh I know what you mean! It’s like watching extreme ends of personality swings and you’re left wondering what went wrong and what went right.

Ramya Abhinand · October 10, 2018 at 6:12 pm

Sigh I wish I could just lock up time in an airtight bottle. My girls are 10 and 6 and I already feel they are growing up and moving away from me. I miss those days of tony feet, scampering around home.

    Shailaja · October 30, 2018 at 10:51 am

    I know what you mean! It’s not easy watching them grow up and change, evolve. I mean we want to give them wings but I feel so overly protective on some days. Sigh. Not easy.

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