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‘Brush your teeth well. You don’t want to lose your teeth before their time!’

‘Did you remember to close the tap? What? You DIDN’T?’


‘Is your room neat? I am NOT picking up any more toys!’

Kids are wired differently. But, I’m guessing you know that by now. If you’re a new parent, just stepping into those shoes, believe me, there are challenges ahead.


Trigger: ‘Lack of interest’ in performing tasksΒ 

Chores bore children. Yes, no question about it. If you ‘tell’ a child to do something, 8 times out of 10, it’s not going to get done. And why should they do it? To them, it’s a task and just the word has an annoying ring to it- full of responsibility, dedication and work! Nobody likes it, take it from me.

That’s what frustrates parents too. They see a child’s clothes on the floor, after they have explicitly told the child to put the dirty clothes in the hamper.

They ask a child to leave the restroom as they found it, only to notice later that the child hasn’t.

They instruct a child to hurry up Β and finish a meal and come back 15 minutes later to find that exactly ONE morsel has gone in.

That does it! The child has ‘wilfully defied’ the parent! This sets off the trigger and soon, you have a full-scale attack on the child, who is reduced to tears, because Mom is busy yelling at him for not doing everything as he was told.

These are sample scenarios I have listed, some of which you can identify with and others you will agree with. Β What was clear from my journey was the fact that I was giving orders and expecting instant obedience. Well, guess what; this isn’t the Army πŸ™‚

As I moved ahead on this parenting path, one thing came to the fore.

Every time I made something FUN for my daughter, not only did the task get done, it would be done at lightning speed and with a smile to boot!

5 Delightful Ways to put the fun back in #Parenting. Click to Tweet

Mom daughter laughing hugging smiling fun. Parenting

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What do I do now?

 

  • I make funny faces:Β Yes, I know how that sounds, but it works. Trust me! If the child is not closing the tap after use, make a face and say that you’re the tap, who is crying, because she forgot to turn you off. Kids laugh and do the job pronto πŸ™‚

 

  • I get down to her level: Instead of ‘telling’ her what to do, I ask her what she’d like to do. Β We discuss what would be the quickest way to pick up the toys. I suggest making a sound like a train, while she suggests prowling around like a tigress, picking up the scattered toys. We compete playfully and get the job done in half the time! That and a shared sense of responsibility work very well.

 

  • I model the behaviour I expect: There’s no way someone is going to do something, if they don’t see it being done first. Kids are no exception to this rule. If I put my clothes in the hamper every single day, sooner or later (most likely, later), the child will get a feel for the routine and do it himself.

 

  • I praise and reward: A few years ago, my husband picked up a Magnetic Responsibility chart, which has lovely reward icons with smiley faces on them for all chores. It’s an easy way to give them non-material rewards without having to repeat yourself ad nauseum. The colours make it attractive and fun!

 

  • I make tasks fun by making up a song: It’s annoying to repeat yourself over and over again for mundane tasks. I get it. We have a hundred other things on our mind and this tardiness and lack of ‘responsibility’ just gets on our nerves! So, I recently came up with an idea to make up a rap song for simple chores. Here’s one I created for brushing:

 

I’ve still got all my milk teeth, ‘Yo!

Let’s brush ’em up and make ’em glow!

 

I set it to a rap beat with my own beat box thrown in and she is up at 6 am, every single day, brushing and dancing her sleepy eyes away. No, you won’t catch me ever singing that in public πŸ˜‰

And , we know that a day that begins with a smile just HAS to get better as it progresses!

Somebody told me last week that it’s important to put the fun back in Parenting. I have to agree that it’s less stressful and a whole lot more enjoyable when we do that.


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Β *Featured and pinnable images courtesy: Shutterstock
Toddler playing with mother by kazoka via Shutterstock

Mom and kid tickling and laughing

Comments

comments


25 Comments

Beloo Mehra · June 26, 2014 at 6:30 am

You are one fun mom, lady Shailaja πŸ™‚ Loved reading about these tips. Some of these can also be so easily adapted for teachers working with younger children. Hope you are sharing these with some teachers too πŸ™‚

Rajlakshmi · June 26, 2014 at 8:04 am

hahaha I would love you see rapping πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ those are awesome pointers πŸ˜€ you truly know how to handle kids πŸ˜€

Aditi · June 26, 2014 at 12:02 pm

Shailaja mommy the rapper…you have to send me your rap!! πŸ˜‰ Superb post!!

Kajal Kapur · June 26, 2014 at 12:08 pm

Great parenting tips…guess parenting is not a pre -formulated plan so with each child there's obviously something that would work that possibly may not work with the other. It then what's the fun in parenting if you know the formula… Thanks

Kathy Combs · June 27, 2014 at 3:17 pm

Some great ideas on how to tame the beasts all children can become! Love the thought of your rapping to your kids…just getting a mental picture of that is simply priceless!

geeta nair · June 29, 2014 at 5:58 am

Great tips.I am sure with all the fun packed in there, children will heed.

Carrie Tyson · June 29, 2014 at 8:31 am

My husband n I av lived together for 8yrs but with no kids, this caused frustration and my husband left me alone for another woman. I was so bitter,cried and Even tried to commit suicide, it was by this river bank while trying to get my self drowned that I met this man.I explained all my problems to him and he laughed and told me about Priest Andrew and said he can be of help, then he gave me his contact as ask me to contact him which i did and told him my situation and he assured me of a solution, and four days after i contacted him, my husband came back. Its 3weeks and 4days now my husband came back and am 2weeks pregnant. all thanks to priestandrew91@yahoo.com

Stacie Dalrymple · June 29, 2014 at 5:30 pm

My kids are older now, but great ideas!

Shailaja V · June 29, 2014 at 5:35 pm

That's a lovely suggestion, Beloo! I should check if there are any teachers who would be interested to read these! Thanks πŸ™‚

Shailaja V · June 29, 2014 at 5:37 pm

Oh yeah, I am pretty crazy at home, which most people won't believe πŸ˜‰

Shailaja V · June 29, 2014 at 5:37 pm

Maybe I will upload it on Sound CLoud and send you the link πŸ˜‰

Shailaja V · June 29, 2014 at 5:38 pm

True, Kajal. We need to innovate constantly. Thanks for commenting πŸ™‚

Shailaja V · June 29, 2014 at 5:38 pm

Glad I made your dose of laughter for the day πŸ˜€

Shailaja V · June 29, 2014 at 5:38 pm

I certainly hope so, Geeta πŸ™‚ So far, it works with my daughter.

Shailaja V · June 29, 2014 at 5:39 pm

Thank you Stacie πŸ™‚

Eli Z · June 29, 2014 at 8:12 pm

Ha ha ha – awesome Shailaja – can relate to all these tips and they do work:-) Going ahead with a good example is great and using songs and humor – oh yeah ! Until they r teens – then it is not that coool anymore – ha ha ha:-)

Tanay · August 16, 2014 at 6:02 pm

My two boy kids fight for every simple reason.how to manage them

Tanay · August 16, 2014 at 6:03 pm

How to manage sibling rivalry?

Shailaja V · August 18, 2014 at 4:46 pm

Hi Tanay. Watch out for the post on sibling rivalry tomorrow on the blog πŸ™‚

Sheshu Kumari · February 3, 2015 at 5:28 am

Hi Shailaja,It's a wonderful post.I have always been thinking of ways not to yell (precisely not so violent ) at my kids.Now i know to make things go in smoother manner.Thanks for your tips..
Sheshu

Rekha Dhyani · January 21, 2016 at 5:39 pm

Some really wonderful tips you've shared, Shailaja! These yelling sessions have reduced to a great extent but I still lose it at times.

    Shailaja · February 2, 2018 at 8:10 am

    That’s so gratifying to hear, Rekha. More power to you. Keep at it πŸ™‚

upasna · February 2, 2018 at 6:13 pm

I can totally relate to this as I found this true too. A nice post for all the parents. Fun is a must element in Parenting.
upasna recently posted QuotedStories linky party #17My Profile

    Shailaja · February 2, 2018 at 6:45 pm

    Thank you, Upasna πŸ™‚ Definitely makes a difference!

Fancy · February 3, 2018 at 5:49 pm

I love these tips. I try them myself all the time. Shouting really doesn’t have effect x

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