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This one will come as no surprise to regular readers of my blog.

‘Y’ is for Yelling less.

There are many things for which I am grateful in this world and one of those is the day I discovered the ‘Orange Rhino Challenge’ kindly pointed out to me by Aparna. In retrospect,  I wish I had stumbled upon it earlier, as I could have avoided so many tears, confrontations, anger issues, temper tantrums and a frightened child. 

My ‘Yelling less’  journey was the way I jump-started my blog from its dormant position.

Although I started it way back in 2007, it was only in July of 2013 that the blog came to life. Many parents read my week-long journal. Most of them commented. Quite a few of them shared their own journeys. It resonated among newbie parents and seasoned ones.


Photo copyright: David Castillo Dominici

Most of all, it made me take a hard, honest and painful look at my parenting. Was I bringing up a militant rebel or nurturing a delicate child? Things needed to change and I am glad to say, they have. Today, my blog is a constant reminder of the struggle I faced  with ‘Yelling’. It is also a permanent marker for my triumphs. 


Do I regret yelling? 

Yes, I do. 

Do I regret the fact that I yelled at all? 

No, because without it, I wouldn’t have connected with so many people, both virtually and in real life. 

For that, I will always look at my ‘yelling’ as a means to an end.



Word count: 253

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Written for the A to Z 2014 Challenge

Y is for Yelling Less

My theme for the month is : Introspection in shades of 11

Also linking this to the Ultimate Blog Challenge for April

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Comments

comments


sulekkha · April 28, 2014 at 7:48 pm

Show me a parent who hasn't yelled at her kid, we all have done it 🙂 Sometimes the fear for their safety makes us yell out our concern but we must avoid doing it and change our ways.

meena · April 28, 2014 at 10:59 pm

I am patient to wait till 7pm to have morng cfee but sometimes when i don't get my time am at peak. One day i told my kid – i just returned from office don bug me…she replied – i just returned from creche, amma…these words broke my heart and my rudeness…

meena · April 28, 2014 at 11:01 pm

I am patient to wait till 7pm to have morng cfee but sometimes when i don't get my time am at peak. One day i told my kid – i just returned from office don bug me…she replied – i just returned from creche, amma…these words broke my heart and my rudeness…

ovengoodies · April 28, 2014 at 11:36 pm

This is my constant struggle and I'm picking up tips from you and your posts. 🙂

Danny Simon · April 29, 2014 at 2:57 am

Yelling as a means to an end! lol! Amazing post though! We always yell and do feel sorry about it sometimes! And sometimes that is the best way to do things too 😉

Sreeja Praveen · April 29, 2014 at 3:11 am

This is an eye-opener post for me, because I have suffered the anger and temper issues too. It's been in control for a long time now, yet there's no limit to the learning that can happen on the topic. Thanks for sharing this here, Shailaja. 🙂
Hugsss 🙂

tulika singh · April 29, 2014 at 4:12 am

Oh yes been there done that. It's so hard to not yell.. I've enjoyed the Orange Rhino too and will always be grateful to you for taking me there.

Nisha · April 29, 2014 at 5:33 am

Yelling is never good – weather with children or adults. I can't even stand a slightly higher tone in the voice… leave alone yelling!

Pixie · April 29, 2014 at 5:51 am

Yelling isn't good.. I yell at times when I lose my temper! 🙁
I just hope when the time comes, I don't yell at my child.

Shilpa Garg · April 29, 2014 at 6:01 am

Sometimes, with smaller kids it is difficult to stop yourself from yelling. But when they grow up, like the phase my child is in, I dont remember when I yelled at him last. And as for yelling at partner or others… I cant even stand a louder tone, so yelling is out of my life, or so I'd like to believe. 😀 Being assertive is the key. Glad for you, Shailaja for taking this yelling less journey! 🙂

Vidya Sury · April 29, 2014 at 6:32 am

I've never felt the urge to yell, or even raise my voice. I grew up like that. The rare occasions when there was yelling – I'd just cringe. I just can't do it. God knows parenting is one thing that is so trying and there are times when it seems impossible to cope – yet, I never yelled. I think it is because I married late and had my son at 34. 😀 Also, no shouting in my nature 😀

I wrote a post on yelling too – but shelved it. Crazy. I remembered you'd be writing about it.

Beloo Mehra · April 29, 2014 at 7:05 am

I can relate to many things from this post, especially the part about how one thing leads to another, how even a weakness we are trying to work upon can open new doors of learning and growth for us. And as for yelling…well I too suffer from this bad habit time to time, and must keep reminding myself of how to overcome this. A very good post today, Shailja.

Swathi Shenoy · April 29, 2014 at 9:24 am

maybe i shud take this challenge too.. yelling less.. i hav been yelling a lot these days n d regrets instantly follow!

Mina Menon · April 29, 2014 at 10:41 am

easier said than done 😉

Pheno Menon · April 29, 2014 at 10:44 am

sometimes saying something with a dangerously calm face can be more menacing than yelling. I prefer that 😉

PhenoMenon
http://throodalookingglass.com/2014/04/yours-tastefully/

proactiveindian.com · April 29, 2014 at 10:57 am

Yelling is one way (not a desirable one!) of releasing steam.
When you stopped yelling, you must have had some other way of releasing or handling that steam. If it's not personal, could you share that.

Cathy Graham · April 29, 2014 at 11:14 am

It's hard not to yell sometimes when things build up. I have a bad temper and am emotional so sometimes need to vent. These days I tend to yell at the big boy (Hubs) more than my two young adult sons though. Hehe! It doesn't help much but it does let off steam. I don't do it that often though. Mostly I get mad at myself more than others. I think I yelled more when I worked full time and felt overly stressed and tired. Now I'm much more relaxed and content (and poor!! hehe) Yelling isn't a great way to deal with stress but I'm similar to my mom and she yelled when we were growing up. I don't like to lose it but I do on occasion. Too emotional, that's me!

Michelle Liew · April 29, 2014 at 3:59 pm

With the frustration, it's hard not to raise your voice!

iwrotethose.com · April 29, 2014 at 7:22 pm

Oooh. Yelling is a part and parcel of being a parent. Especially to a toddler, as I've come to realise. The worst part is within seconds of “yelling”, I feel all upset and bogged down. Glad you seem to have got the recipe perfectly. Oh, and congratulations on the 86 yell-free days. May that gone on forever 🙂

Shailaja V · April 30, 2014 at 7:42 am

Interesting you should ask that, Pro. I'm planning a weekly series on the blog. Tackle each yelling trigger with examples and counter tactics 🙂 I hope you'll check back 🙂

Ananya Tales · April 30, 2014 at 6:05 pm

Congratulations ! Yayy we survived the challenge ! Thanks for sharing your insightful posts !

http://www.ananyatales.com/2014/04/zeal-for-life.html

Aparna · May 21, 2014 at 4:56 am

Ah yes Y has to be for Yell (less) ;).. Still a challenge for me, as I found when spending all hours of the day in close proximity with the kiddos :P.. Almost looking forward to school so that I can structure my day accordingly ;).

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